Tag Archives: thanksgiving

a day without dad

this is the first thanksgiving without my father. i thought of him throughout the night. thanksgiving has never been one of my favorite holidays because “family dinners” always ended up rather dismal. dad would usually be drinking and wishing he were elsewhere; mom would be stressed putting on a big meal, knowing that at some point dad would turn nasty, finding an excuse to storm out of the house to go hang at the bar.

later, after mom died, thanksgiving was a battle of who’s house to eat at and the inevitable pressure put on us from the family contingent that was not being graced with our obligatory presence. a particularly annoying case of family push-me-pull-me nonsense.

i tried having thanksgiving at my house one year, but there’s something wrong with vegetarians cooking turkey and the universe cursed us for the effort. see http://thereallinda.livejournal.com/2004/11/27/ for that particular misery.

last night was very nice. my son, jess and his girlfriend came, brni’s parents, marnie’s dad and a few family friends came with assorted wines and musical instruments. after dinner we all played music and sang silly songs.

last year dad was with us and had a very happy time.
i sent him a song for the day.

giving thanks

I don’t think Americans, as a society, would be described as a thankful group. Most people around the world think us arrogant bullies. We consume everything with a sense of entitlement. We expect the biggest and the best and we expect it immediately. We are such an ungrateful people that we must set aside a special day to collectively recognize our prosperity and give thanks for our many blessings.

So today, I read the Thanksgiving installment of “The Ladybug Letter.” I highly recommend this little blog by an American farmer. Here’s a link to today’s post, “A Taste for Panchamama.”


pre-thanksgiving ramblings

Brni has been in NYC the past two days, so time shifted to *my* time, which is decidedly different from regular time. My time doesn’t measure out in any reliable or regular way. It jumps and stalls and often just leaves the room to do what, I don’t know. I suppose time is being kind and leaving me alone for a bit.


Usually, when Brni is gone I sleep differently. I end up in the middle of the bed adapting a more sprawling attitude. The night usually goes faster because I wake up less often when I’m alone, but last night I didn’t sleep at all. I was wound up from a full day and night working on The Spine Witch digital painting. I finished it several times, went downstairs to go to bed, only to get up within a few minutes to go up and make a change. Finally around 3am I gave up and just stayed upstairs and worked on some new ideas. When I my brain started to tremble around 5am, I was finally able to crawl into bed and sleep for a few hours.

Insomnia like this hasn’t plagued me in years and years. Used to happen all the time in my teens and twenties, when I was better able to shrug off fatigue. Don’t try this in your 50’s–it’s really counter-productive and way more painful.

When I woke up, I followed Loki out the bedroom to let her out and make coffee. Loki trotted out to the living room, stopped abruptly with hackles raised and barked her high-pitched howly-bark she usually reserves for the UPS man. I looked up worried that there was an intruder when I realized that what startled my brilliant, protective dog was the sun streaming through the window. I guess a week or so of rainy gray weather is long enough for a dog to forget what the sun looks like.

Around 11am I decided to do all my errands in case I collapsed unexpectedly. I donned the sweatshirt I use for the “in-between” seasons (above freezing/under 60) and was shocked into removing it by the heat. Here it is, the day before T-day and it’s like 65 degrees out! So, off came the sweatshirt and off I went to the bank, then the dog food store and people food store.

Brni requested persimmons, so I looked for them at Whole Foods but no luck. They did have them at Yang’s, so Brni gets to try his hand at Dave’s Famous Persimmon Pudding. Me, I’m just making a big green salad for my T-day offering.

My last stop was the likker store for wine. I noted another oddity of Pennsylvania’s state stores today. All the state stores I’ve patronized have two doors. One door is entrance only and you must push it open like the doors of yesteryear. The other door is exit only and it opens automagically.

hmmm….I guess they want you to work for your spirits.


It’s after 6pm and I’m still up. My brain is foggy and my fingers fumbly so I’m certain I’ll have a lovely nights sleep tonight, even if Brni snores.

Hope those of you in the US have a happy T-day with lots of really good food. Here’s to salad and persimmon pudding.

%d bloggers like this: