winding my way to the end of the year

a heron crossed my path the other day. for some reason, i found this ominous. i’ve always viewed herons as wonderful creatures and thought of them as messengers of good fortune. not this one. this felt like a warning. i have been vigilant ever since, but it’s wearing me down.

i’m very tired tonight. the holidaze have done me in both physically and emotionally. the day brought good food, spirited drinks, dear family and honored friends. it also brought sadness and serious worry for some of my loved ones. a child’s hurt cut my heart; a friend’s bitterness wrenched my gut. i have not slept through the night since. brni is sleeping south of here till sometime on thursday and i simply want to take this time to cushion my senses from the world.

a new year is just around the corner and i’m hoping for strength, insight and inspiration. oh, and to lose weight. and maybe live through the year watching all those i love have a really good time of it.

to bed. no dreams, please.

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