busy and crazy and hopeful

I’m so tired. It’s surprising what a toll it takes on a person to care for another who is infirm or disabled or just indisposed. What is strange is that everything I’m doing, I do normally throughout the course of the day. I make coffee, get breakfast, lunch, dinner. I straighten, clean, make the bed, feed the animals, etc. The only additional tasks are emptying and filling the “iceman,” hooking Brni up to the machine, extra errands for things like bandages, thermometers, ice, ginger ale, etc. And watching over (hovering?) Brni to make sure he’s O-K-A-Y.

[That’s the real thing of it. The making sure he’s okay. Making sure he’s taking his meds, comfortable, clean, fed and watered. To all my nurse-friends out there, I bow my head to you.]

In the everyday, no-surgery world, Brni does an amazing amount of work around here. I honestly had not realized how much until the past few days doing both my stuff as well as his stuff. And I’ve begun to realize that his stuff is way more than I thought. I’m coming away from this with a new respect for the usual, every day chores that Brni does just as a matter of course. I guess it takes something like this to open our eyes to the little things that take up time and really do matter.

So, yeah, I’m tired and stressed with the added responsibility, but I’m also happy to do it. It’s a good kind of tired and the stress is worth it if it means Brni can get through his day without constant pain. Tomorrow is his first physical therapy session–the next step on the path of healing.

Wish us luck.

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